Earn Trust First
Everything Else Comes Later.
“Earn trust, earn trust, earn trust. Then you can worry about the rest.” – Seth Godin
Would you travel the world with Zimbabwe's currency with you?
Would you give responsibility to someone who is easily distracted?
Would you lend money to someone who has not kept his word before?
Would you make friends with someone who risks ruin for quick gains?
Would you like to work for someone who takes credit but doesn’t give credit?
If the answer is NO, then it’s time you realize that your gestures, words, or actions lead to an energy exchange between you and someone else. This exchange can be called a trust dividend or trust tax, as defined by Stephen Kovey in his book ‘Speed of Trust.’
Keeping your word, seeking advice, or admitting your mistake adds to your trust account. And every time you break your promise, fall short of expectations, or don't rise to the challenge, it taxes your trust account.
This constant debit and credit of trust accumulates into sizeable positive or negative balances in your trust account over time. It’s invisible, but it's subconsciously happening in people’s minds, which shapes their interactions with you. This very trust account of yours in people’s minds will eventually decide the mountains you get to climb and conquer in your journey.
How do you explain that multi-millionaires will sell their company to Warren Buffett on a mere handshake? In contrast, with others, sellers need to go through a 400-page contract with their lawyers to iron out every loophole that the acquirer can exploit.
He has built a seamless web of deserved trust with his investors, employees, peers, bankers, foundations, students, government, and every section of society. His principles, motives, words, and actions have also been consistent.
He is 93 now and hasn’t displayed inconsistency between his principles, motives, words, and actions. This clarity of thought and execution has earned him the reputation and glory he has achieved.
Is it easy?
Of course not.
Was it a slow journey?
Of course, yes.
But was it worth it?
You Bet !!!
The irony is that trust isn’t always at the top of your mind because you're busy playing me-win games instead of win-win games. It’s our genetic defect so I won’t blame you entirely. Let me share a few examples -
How do I look good?
How do I make more money?
How can I leave an impression?
How do I get bigger, better, faster?
It always begins with “How do I…… ?”
We are all genetically designed to do everything in our capacity to fit into a social crowd or go with the herd because we desperately want to fit into society and be accepted, validated, and appreciated.
Most will not care if it comes with shortcuts or ignoring one’s moral compass.
It’s like playing Cricket while constantly watching your score. How will you make your team win if you're overly concerned about your score?
It reminds me of all the players who have played a slow inning for their half-century/century but at the expense of their team losing the game. KL Rahul comes to mind every time I think of selfish innings.
It takes courage to stand firm with your principles and values and let go of the temptations or seductions that come your way for personal trophies and accolades.
Whereas, if you were playing win-win games, your mind would always wonder, “How do we both win in this situation?”
You would keep your word for the smallest thing
You would give credit every time you got an opportunity
You would hear someone out completely before opinionating
You would take time out from your busy schedule for your loved ones
You would keep a portion of your income for charities or philanthropy
You would constantly add energy to the space you are in, contribute more than required, give more than expected, and respect first before commanding respect. That’s what win-win games look like. And it doesn’t cost you more than some time and attention.
When you execute your principles at all times, your motives can also be understood clearly; your words and actions are in sync with your motives.
When done consistently, you will first become a millionaire in your trust account held in people’s minds before you become a dollar millionaire in real life.
“It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.” – Stephen R. Covey
Work on building trust first. Everything else you desire will be laid out at your feet, eventually !!!
Wishing you a fantastic weekend 🧉
Sending you loads of love and luck🧿
Manish